The Birdie is having some fun with puns in A-K Valley

By: HSSN Staff
Wednesday, September 20, 2017 | 5:21 PM

As the Week 3 scores rolled in Friday night, the Birdie thought his eyes were deceiving him. Perhaps the cheap sunglasses he favors somehow were transposing the game results.

Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. Instead he had to accept the reality that he experienced one of his worst weeks in recent memory.

The record — 7-5 — still bothers him nearly a week later.

“That just won't get it done,” he said. “That record gets you invited to the Little Caesars Bowl instead of the Fiesta Bowl. And as much as I like a good pizza, I'd much rather have a fiesta.”

He didn't offer any excuses for his poor showing.

“I'm Plum out of explanations,” he said. “Who would have thought the best Dakota wasn't North or South, but Dakota Sunday?”

Then again, “I had a bad week, but Apollo-Ridge had Moore issues.”

When the Birdie has a bad week, he doesn't get mad, he gets punny. Some appreciate it, some don't.

“Some people have problems with my Quips,” he said, “but Freeport really struggled with them last week.”

The Birdie went out on a limb with some teams last week. It didn't pay off.

“Leechburg got rooked by Bishop Canevin,” he said. “Those guys talk all the time about proving me wrong. I guess they finally got their wish last week.”

The Birdie isn't giving up after his bad week: “Never quit. Never surrender,” he said. He believes a better week is in store.

“Heck,” he said, “Deer Lakes or Valley will win this week. Why can't I?”

Here's a look at the Week 4 picks:

Burrell (1-3, 0-2) at Apollo-Ridge (3-1, 1-1)

If you're looking for a quick Buc, look no further than Logan Bitar, who has 543 yards and four touchdowns this season. That could spell trouble for Apollo-Ridge, which couldn't touch the Skyy last week, but the Vikings offense should make up for it.

Apollo-Ridge, 27-20

Highlands (2-1, 2-1) at Mars (3-1, 2-1)

Highlands will need its defense to be Ram tough to slow down Mars' ground game, which can be out of this world when it gets going. The wing-T will get off the ground.

Mars, 31-21

Kiski Area (0-4, 0-3) at Connellsville (1-3, 0-3)

Connellsville may be struggling after a 50-point loss to McKeesport, but Kiski Area can't afford to be Cavalier heading into this game — not if it wants to get into the win column for the first time this season.

Kiski Area, 28-7

Leechburg (0-4, 0-3) at Springdale (1-3, 0-3)

The Birdie predicting Leechburg to beat Bishop Canevin turned out to be a failed Crusade — “one I won't soon repeat,” he groused. Springdale couldn't find its center against Beth-Center but should rebound against the Blue Devils.

Springdale, 28-7

McKeesport (2-1, 2-1) at Plum (2-2, 2-1)

Plum looked like some shiny new Mustangs last week, routing Franklin Regional despite playing without its starting quarterback. They'll have a harder time taming the Tigers.

McKeesport, 28-14

Riverview (1-2, 1-2) at Bishop Canevin (1-2, 1-1)

With games so far against the Blue Devils, Saints and now the Crusaders, Riverview must feel it has a Holy War on its hands. But this is a battle the Raiders don't have enough manpower to win.

Bishop Canevin, 21-6

Shady Side Academy (2-1, 2-1) at Freeport (2-1, 1-0)

The visiting Indians are feeling pretty Skyy high after their quarterback led them to a big win over Apollo-Ridge. Freeport found out that playing Aliquippa can be the “Pits.” Do the Yellowjackets have a bounce-back performance in store?

Freeport, 28-27

Upper St. Clair (3-1, 3-0) at Fox Chapel (1-3, 1-2)

This USC team might not have a Heisman hopeful at quarterback, but the Panthers are plenty dangerous on offense anyway. “I'm not crazy about the Foxes' chances,” Birdie said.

Upper St. Clair, 35-21

Valley (0-3, 0-2) at Deer Lakes (0-3, 0-3)

Valley can't be very happy right now about a winless start, given the Vikings' preseason playoff expectations. Deer Lakes' offense, meanwhile, was KO'd last week — the Lancers haven't scored since Week 1.

Valley, 21-7

Tags: Apollo-Ridge, Burrell, Deer Lakes, Fox Chapel, Freeport, Highlands, Kiski School, Leechburg, Plum, Riverview, Springdale, Valley